#Careem has made our lives easier to commute, and more often than not, people prefer taking Careem instead of driving on their own because you have to have A LOT of patience if you want to move around in Lahore during any hour of the day without losing your calm.

If you’re a regular user of Careem like me, you’d understand that we meet so many (CAPTAINS) everyday, some amusing and some maddening because the numbers of hours they spend on the road and the various backgrounds they come from, effect us too.

So, here are the 10 types of Careem Captains you meet.

THE CHATTY CATHY

This one’s the most common type who loves to talk and practically wants to be your best friend. So he’ll talk about the weather, how people in Lahore don’t know how to drive, PTI or PPP – it doesn’t end anywhere for him.

THE EX FORMULA 1 DRIVER

The moment he “starts the ride” his speedometer goes from 0-60 seconds in SECONDS and you can feel your bile sliding up your throat because this GTA inspired driver is going to make all your dreams seem….. like the last one.

THE SMELLY CAT

Even though we didn’t want to bring this up, but it’s quiet true. A lot of men, especially people belonging to the lower social strata aren’t very good with personal hygiene and this is what we have to deal with in a lot of cases – bad body odour. You can’t even say it to them, and worse, they don’t even know it themselves.

INQUISITIVE MUCH?

This Captain won’t stop asking you personal questions and will try his hardest to learn every single bit of your life; from where you live, to what you do, how you do it, what’s the future of it and so on. For him, you are his long lost relative who is going to stop at nothing to find out your cast and creed also.

THE SCREAMING & YELLING TYPE

(I’ve met many)… This Captain always has a personal issue ruining his day, and even though he doesn’t want to get entangled into any of it when he has a “ride in progress”, he still finds himself embroiled in an argument with a friend, a family member, and most of the times, with the CAREEM HELPLINE. The former’s the worse, I tell you.

THE STORY TELLER

This particular type is going to make you a part of his life, heck, he’ll even trace your lineage to his some way or the other, that’s how much he loves to talk about himself and how he got to become a Careem Captain. From his childhood, to failed opportunities in life, and how he feels about driving a cab in Lahore, he’ll make sure you know everything to the T.

THE EAGER ONE

This Captain is going to cut through lanes, traffic jams and get you to your destination. He’ll yell at people, wildly honk and zoom through every other vehicle around him and end the ride with the screeeeeeeeeeech. Phew!

THE ZEN MASTER

This Captain is a weird mix of getting on time and chilled out, and he literally takes the word “CALM” to a whole new level of annoyance. Traffic jams, apocalypses and even Godzilla can’t kill his zen vibe. Imagine that!

THE LADY CAPTAIN

She’s the sweet type, who will take you straight to your destination with the help of Google Maps. She’ll watch the roads, drive carefully and make sure to adhere to all traffic rules. So peaceful.

THE ALLAH WALAY LOG

This Captain is going to play The Quran loudly, not that I mind it, but the general etiquette is too lower the volume when you’re driving someone around, but you can’t say that without offending him. Kahan jayen?

Share:
Written by Faryal Syed
Asst Editor. Blogger. Enthusiast