When I got married, I entered the marriage with a different set of expectations such as wanting loyalty, compassion and a certain kind of openness from my partner. However, there are some things that are absolutely unacceptable no matter what kind of rapport you have with your spouse because there are things no spouse should be expected to do. Often we tell our partners to do things and feel about situations that prove to be unhealthy in the marriage down the line. So, considering from my experience and what we see and hear all around us, here are the 6 things that no spouse should ever be expected to do.
Here’s what you should look for in a long term partner.
SAY YES TO EVERYTHING
So, you married them, but that doesn’t mean that you stop doing things that you once used to love, or change your eating habits and food preference – a marriage is about sharing and receiving and feeling comfortable in the relationship. No spouse should expect from their partner to compromise on the things that make them happy.
BE THERE 24/7
You cant be expected to be there for your spouse all the time. There are somethings that they will have to take care for themselves since your spouse shouldn’t be responsible for your happiness and sorrows.
ABANDON FAMILY & FRIENDS
If your partner tries to isolate you from your family and friends, then you should immediately consider that as a big red flag that is called “abuse”. No spouse should manipulate you into forsaking the most important people in your life, because listen up, if that’s what he’s doing, do not comply by giving him the reigns of your life.
BE A MIND READER
Perhaps the most ridiculous expectation of all is to think your spouse is going to be a super mind reader. Even though I see couples who have spent decades together do know their spouse, their likes and dislikes, notice when they’re upset, but even they cant read each others minds, which is why everyone stresses on communication and verbalizing your feelings in order to make your partner understand you better.
NOT FEEL DISAPPOINTED
You’re married to a person who will make mistakes and no matter far in advance you plan for something, something will go wrong. Disappointments are a part of life and whoever told you that your partner is never going to disappoint you was clearly not in the right space. The important thing though is that how you behave and manage when you are disappointed. It is that moment which’ll reveal the kind of person you are.
BE PERFECTLY IN SYNC
Two different people means different in opinions, arguments and disagreements, feelings, ideas and way of communication etc, no two people together can remain in a perfect state of mind. So, no spouse should expect you to be in sync with them since it’s not even close to being possible.
AGREE TO EVERYTHING
Relationships are more like partnerships which means that you don’t have to agree to everything your partner says you to do. From spending time with each others families to having important discussions, we all can have different opinions. So YES does not have to be the answer to everything.
DISRESPECT SEXUAL BOUNDARIES
We all have different tastes and likes therefore every couple should respect each others boundaries and not force their partner into engaging in any act that they do not feel comfortable doing. Putting fetishes and fun aside, I understand the need to spice up your marriage but mutual consent is more important than a forced act.
TOLERATE INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOUR FROM THE IN-LAWS
We all have those odd family members who can be intolerable, obnoxious and rude, so your partner just because is married to you is not supposed to tolerate anyone’s behaviour and suck it up. Either party should step up to put a stop to intolerable behaviour.
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